Actually, i have no idea to feel right now... Really? Like literally... 
-To be glad that, bo safely came back home...
-To be annoyed with the fact that thinking she might have sprained her ankle...

Lets just review few things along yeah...
From Friday onward...

Thursday night,  kinda had an argument to the extend BO wanted to have some time, saying no texting, nor meeting her and all near her place... Sigh! I swear, i really couldn't sleep, i was seriously so upset, with also the fact that the air-con was not really helping giving stupid noises and shit... 

Friday, woke up late, was a bit late to school... Sigh... Literally mood less in the morning, i didn't even wanna use my phone, its so usual for me to text bo good morning and all, but she told me not to text her... Damn you know.. :( My misery was all over, went i received a message from her, you know i was on the lab, but when i see her message appearing... i was so pleased and i went out to see it, i was happy, hehe! Not exaggerating ahh...
"FATTY BOMBOM..." hehe! so cute of her, but i was wondering is she was fine... We continued texting and all... She apologized... The entire friday, i was watching movies back to back... 
-Jeyam
- Muni
-Dhoom 2
These were the movies i was watching... Unproductive day la, after that went to work, during work, was so much fun and all, with the fact that, bainah, fira, ferdi all doing closing together... Was not really that busy i guess but kinda tired... I have to work more often now... My bill came up to 156... ;(

Now, yesterday night, bo was craving for burger and 7-11 coke, sigh!!! She had to drink something gassy so she chose 7-11 coke, reasonable... I choose not to make it a big fast, cause it was fair, i hope she remembered the promise she made to me saying no 7-11 big gulp, but yesterday it was exceptional... Felt so helpless when she made me pinky upon her to do things, i was worried with the part where she wanted to climb out and all... I have never doubted her that she can do all this, as in, yeah, i was not worried about the part where she gonna climb out all, not at all...
My main concern was, this action becoming a habit... Remember the times where i was able to climb out of my window and come over... Once i did once, i started doing as a routine like that, everything, you want me come, i can... Something like that... I didn't realize that there are limits to things when i faced it, when i was busted by my parents for this dear... I am afraid since once you have done it, you might have the urge to keep doing again and again ma... I wouldn't wan you to make the same mistake as me dear... That was why i keep stressing to you this better not be done often....

I care for you, please god damn understand can, dear, which guy would allow the girl he loves to do such a thing? Think about how would i feel... I pamper you so much, you know how i treat you... small small things i wanna make sure, you don't use much effort to do, even if things can be done, i wanna make sure, you relax so that i can do and provide you... You're like a baby bo... Times, i always ask you be careful, i always worry 10 times more if you are ill or if something happen, even now, i feel so upset with your ankle in pain... ;(
And what was the text you give and all dear... you tell me bo... "Can you stop, don't be a fucktard, i don't care. please just stop... I swear to god i will go MIA from you... or its gonna be back to give me space and don't text me...

HOW THE FUCK AM I STILL NOT GIVING YOU SPACE BO... ANSWER ME... ;( Its so frustrating at the same time, so depressing you know d... How am i not giving you space... Why? It was so threatening you know ma... After a long day, coming back home, texting, you say such things, isn't fair d, i know it wasn't fair for you that i told you best not to go all...
- your eyes were tired
-headache tummy ache
-you seem so sleepy
Who would allow you go ma? I didn't sleep d, just because i pinky upon you to sleep, i forced myself to sleep... Bo, please... I really wanna know, what you feel and whats bothering you d, i'm not meeting you nor even forcing you when can meet all, it's all texting d, what more space you wan b? :( I am sorry if i said things hurting all, but i dont think it was fair for me to hear such things d, also, i have not been stalking you ever since you said you wan space bo, i swear upon you, if you happen to think that i might know things through twitter and all just because i stalk, no dear, i just wanna make things clear bo!!! 

Seems that my weekends are finally week, end of Week 2 and hello week 3 of my FYP! Argh!!! Some weekend i guess, to just sum up from Friday till today which is Sunday... 
Friday, Bo came over to school to have lunch with me! yay! hehe! Thanks for coming love, after that she went off, cause she had to settle her watch and all... Then after my FYP, went to work straight... I kinda regret working on that day, because, it was so crowded and there were some  miscommunications  between me and my crew mates... I kinda like screamed at chubby monkey, i am sorry!!! Cause she kinda was walking here and there in my bar... Now the whole crew knows not to mess or talk to me when its very busy...
hahas! I wonder if its a good thing or a bad thing? Who cares??? hehe! :P So it was such a busy night at  work, to the extent i could not really text bo much... Reached home like 330 in the morning... Its Saturday already!

Saturday... hehe! :) You can see the images below already!! HOLI!!!! :)

So, it was like me, bo, her bother and pravin plus thier friends all, there were quite a few more people la... hehe! Wasn't really a good time i manage to give... :( I in fact, kinda manage to ruin things yet again... but yet, it was some experience i had... :/ So we all like reached home like 11-12 plus like that... I kinda slept like 3 plus i think, yeap... That shirt above, its gonna be like that through out... hehe! :P But the point that, i was with bo, nothing else mattered to me,  just the fact that i manage to spend few hours with her, though it was not really hours that she wanted, cause i ruined things, but i was with her, beside her, holding her, talking to her... Its enough for me... :)

Today, Sunday morning went to soccer, at kovan soccer court, before that, went to pump bo ball... Managed to do that, now finally she can practise some ball works... hehe YAY! :)

Then went to Kovan court to play futsal... Vaisha and his gang... We were just keep winning and winning... it was a good experience today with a new bunch of people... After that went to work, i was kinda waiting for bo to reply and all, but she was asleep, i had no choice but to leave, i was like 45 minutes waiting i guess. Still eating, hehe! :P Sorry dear... Went to work, was shagged la, did houskeeping today, but today work was rather fun, can say, came home like at 10 plus, now blogging... TMRW FYP, sian! I miss bo so much... I am wishing if she was with me right now, i wanna just cuddle her so tight and not wanan let go!!! I miss you my dearie, hope you are doing fine... 

Today, damn lepak sia! Sigh! 2nd day today, have been going to school today! Wahh, ever since FYP have started, i have been literally been eating a lot... Damn... Was sleeping today most of the time today, i thought it was only me, but seems like the other people in the lab were also sleeping, hahas! :P It was rather a boring day, my supervisor was so busy and all, she only came to check on what i was doing like 10 minutes before the entire thing ends today! Wahhhh... I am happy in a way, cause my supervisor kinda gave me a brief idea on what i have to start on tmrw, so i do know what i am gonna do and all, But....
I have to finish up a mind map and my weekly report, first time, i feel like i am being kinda responsible and hardworking and all... I wonder how come i got this kind of link...
It was rather cold today as well... Been drinking 1.5 liters of water everyday and all... hahas! So after that, was on my way back home, reached yishun mrt, received a text from bo that she going yoga, obviously i would want to go and all... And yes, took a train back and met her at amk station from there followed her to Toa Payoh... It was a short while with b, but a satisfying one, the fact that i was able to see her... I really missed you a lot bo!!! Honestly, i was kinda tired bo, but but but, it can never be compared to the fact that i am gonna see you... hahas! Still remembered the time where after i came back from cambodia, that very night, after i shower and all, went to surprise you with a visit to your place... hehe! Things will just happen if you put in the heart and soul to it dear, i would say that, if i wan to see you, i will! No matter what, i do sound scary right? hehe! AIYA baby, you should know me well enough baby! So after i sent her, i was thinking i would be able to go home, but baby forgot her earpiece, i didn't wanna leave wondering if she might have extra, so waited, went near her place to pass it to her... yay! :) baby go her earpiece back... :) Now blogging at the same time listening to a song baby influenced me today....

hehe! Wonder why and how i fancy this song... hehe! but i love it... :) It was a nice hangout with you today baby! Time just passes very fast, but i just wish time does not pass fast when i am with you dear... I would rather the time not pass at all when i am with you... I am already missing you dearie!!! Love you sweetheart... XOXO :)

Good morning bo, hahas! Came like so early to FYP, now its like 820, damn... Hey sweets, i wanna just take this time to say a few things and all dear, don't get me wrong alright baby! As in, nothing wrong or anything just felt like i want to clear some thing out from my mind... FYP has started for me dear, i am sure you're aware of that, times of us texting that much also like, not like how it used to and all, you know what i mean like, you sleeping late, and by the time you wake up and all, its already half the day gone, like 3-4 plus already... I am still in the process of trying to adapt to that baby!!! I hope i am not rushing and all for you, i mean its like holidays for you, you should be like, having fun and all... but not to the extend where sleep till too late sweetheart, i am really worried for you by the time FYP starts, it is gonna be very hard to adapt, trust me on that dear, i am already feeling the pain... :( ITS really that fucked up dear, imagine me staying at Sembavang, going to YCK is not really that far, but yet i feel so crappy, imagine you from Hougang, going towards TAMPANIES.... Thinking of it already, makes me feel one kind, i wonder how you gonna adapt dear, not that you won't, i am sure you will... All i am saying is, you have all the rights to enjoy your holidays dear, at the same time, i wanna you have a plan, on what you want to do and all... Hope i am not telling much or anything, i might sound a bit naggy, but bare with me alright sweetie, you know about me...

Yesterday, i came back home like at about 12 in the morning, which is midnight... We were still texting and all, but few things...

- I texted you asking how much you need,m did you reply bo? I also need to know how much i need to draw out and pass it to you dear...
- i saw your email this morning only dear, cause i did not receive any like a beep or ringtone for that... Baby, try to please tell me what you gonna do before hand dear, PLEASE... How many times you have done this? Least i won't expect much and might want to go and sleep, you know a simple goodnight from you means much to me right, knowing that, i actually was a bit of a disappointed in the morning, but yet, your text message made me feel better... I am sorry if i sound harsh anything dear, never meant to... You know how much i love you right... 

I might sound as though like so fixed and planned, but i don't really fancy this la bo... Think about it alright pumpkin... Sorry if anything wrong ah dear...! Muacks!!!

Good morning baby... I'm actually damn lazy and tired right now to blog, but I couldn't help It because I kinda told you that I'll blog now in the train... :) on my way to work baby. 
It's True that I won't be able to see you of spend much time with you like how it was and all, but one think that isn't true that, we won't be able to see each other or what... For instance yesterday, last minute also, I somehow managed to see you, at night, last minute, buying you 7-11 coke and all... Bo, there'll be ways boooo. Trust me, I actually don't really worry much, cause I'll somehow manage to see you, but boo, I can't always be the want wanting or saying ot expecting that I wanna meet you... " giri, you mind coming here awhile?" Something like that, obviously, I'll try my very best to make sure things happen or to come over...  That's for sure dear. Baby, I'm missing you... Thinking of such things like unable to see much and all, really worries me, but sometimes, we can't always expect where our loved ones will always be there with us and all, In out case, it's just a matter of meeting only dear, I'm sure we can work things out, very sure about that dear...
Dear... This is the time where, we shouldn't fight much and ensure things go well between us, I really stress the part like the understanding and the communication between us baby! I'm very sure, we can work on that very well...
Yesterday, I received something unexpected from you, that's a letter, I'm sorry I didn't read that at home, cause I was so excited and really couldn't resist wanting to read it bo... I was so touched and really felt so deep... Those weren't just words from you bo, was more than that... Thank you so much for the letter baby. Really, you've no idea how much it means to me... I really wanna just hug you tight and give you kisses everywhere... Sigh...
I'm sorry I couldn't hug you tightly bo... :( I really am gonna miss you so much, how things were and all, but I'm verb sure unexpected things and surprises will occur, beware my baby... You should be still sleeping... :) my bobo, take care my sweetheart, 
I love you so much... XOXOXOXOXO!!!! 

There were so many events that have happened lately and all, so many images also taken and yet, i have not been blogging about it, Dammit! Hopefully, later i spare some time to slowly update along my recent activities that has been happening...

FYP started for me, and yet i have so called missed for like a week already, i am kinda prepared to face the music by my supervisor... hehe! :P Nahh... Went to dinner to meet my classmates, oh boy, sure did miss them and all, hehe! :) Before that went to meet bo, was so nice to see her, though it was just a short while with her and all, it was one worth of my time with her, short and yet, it was so nice and sweet, thanks bobo! :) Now blogging, was waiting for bo, to finish up her book so that i can sleep now, damn i yawning, bo should be asleep, kinda tired, was talking about pads all, ewww... some topic to talk about ah! hehe! :P lalalalala~! :p
LOVE YOU BOBO!!!!

Well, after last night, i thought of not using my phone much knowing that i might some how aggravate bo or something but i could not help it, i sometimes hate myself for giving in so easily when it comes to love! DAMMIT!!! Well, morning reaching work place, texted bo, hoping a good day for her, wished her and made sure that she woke up feeling happy, and yes.... Some day at work as well, was damn busy la!!! Today got my pay, like 500 plus, booked practical lessons, and then wanted to get bo the pandora Charm... And i have to thank the god that things somehow went well and got me what i wanted, well actually, not really what i wanted but it was better than not getting it, i sound as though it does not make much sense but bare with it, its like from raffles place to promenade to Vivo, to Hougang and then back home, my god! hehe! Some day right, was glad to see bo today! Really unexpected but yay!!! Some how, i wanted to get more things for bo, bought, so call bought bikini and a shirt for bo, now i am like into bras, especially cartoon characters!!! Something wrong with me right! hehe! :P Was watching movie and all, bo too, i didn''t study today at all! sSigh! Have to study tmrw, hope to sleep soon! hehe! :P

On my way to work now, blogging. Small things I say or tell, it simply just makes Bo explode, I've never seen her this mad or pissed at me before for a small thing. My point now is not to pick on you bo. I'm afraid that when when I ask something or say something, you might get annoyed or mad. Anything, I'm just gonna blog about it, least you might see and know what's going on. Usually yesterday, I would update that I've reached home and all, but I didn't, :( I'm sorry... Everyone is the morning, would wanna wake up either seeing good things, hearing good things or just simply wouldn't wanna have a bad morning. I could simply text saying good morning all, but afraid that I might ruin your day... :( I can't afford any more fights with you. Don't wish too. As much as it hurts that I don't wanna talk much till your exams are over, maybe that's another reason, exam stress. 

Dear, I am not really a good to advise all right now, prolly the last person you would wanna hear from now, but all I ever just wanna say is, I have confidence in you and I am sure you'll some how figure things out... You're a bold girl and I'm so sure that you can solve any kind of tough situations you're in. Last paper on Monday dear. I'm so sure you can do this. You can do this dear. I believe in you. You need anything or want anything, just let me know ma, I'll do my level best to make things done for you. Please don't be so stressed or anything. I wish you a good day ahead dearie. 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

Exams have started and all! Just 2 papers for me, and yet i still feel kinda stress, bo has like 4 papers i guess... Guessing she would be having a much more hard time than me i guess...

Well, today, went to school in the afternoon to study with my friends and all, more like my classmates, manage to do like 2 questions only, pathetic right! After that, i had to rush off to the game, some staff game that i got invited to play for and all... To talk about that game ahhh... Been like a month plus since i have worked out, to me, working out is like a daily basis for me, okay daily basis is a bit too much to say and all, like at least i do workout like 4 times a week, when there was soccer trainings and competitions, but since IVP is over, i cut down on working out all :( DAMN SIAN!!! When i wanna work out, i tend to be lazy... Nowadays, i have been sleeping more and have been EATING A LOT, like literally... Sigh, the game was such a hit, ouch! I got hit big time and i feel damn shitty right now... Sigh! :( That's all about today...

For the past 3 days, have been feeling damn shitty since the fight with bo!!! I really regret being such an ass towards bo, cause like nowdays, i feel as though text messages are being cold and all... Don't get me wrong dear... You should know how much i miss texting you much and talking to you, i dunno when was the last time i have ever spoke to you, like hear your voice ma, i am really missing you so much... 

Exams are still on going, i understand... Parents at home, mother around... You have reasons that you cannot do anything, you are really in tight situation where things really can't go in favour to you... I understand ma, but i can't help it by thinking like that... Been really different these days... :( I am sorry to say this all ma! Usually when i feel down, if there is something bothering, talking things out to you is my style, but i feel that, if i tend to open my mouth or anything right now, i am so afraid that i ruined things further ma! Already right now, you can't text much, if i were to say this... I Doubt you might even wanna text me... :( I created blog not just to like update my daily things or my memories all, also to tell you things that i dun dare, not say dun dare, but not really having the right time or opportunity... It might sound as though i am thinking too much... I am just stating the possibilities ma... Is like, i know the answers to the questions and yet am feeling this way, contradicting right... I know ma! I am laughing right now as well... I can't afford to hear such things like, " Dowan, you make me feel irritated..." NOT MAKING A BIG FUSS DEAR!!!! yes, i have encountered worse things from you and all... But at that point of time, after not hearing from you like a day after your parents came to fetch you from school till the next day, i would not wanna hear such things ma! "Psycho..." Dear, am not ma! Please, I have not gone against anything you have done unless it is necessary or i feel that it could have been better, just saying...

Waited an hour, plus travelled to and from to NYP to TP, i was damn tired dear, weather also not helping, freaking damn hot, at the same time, asking you such a question or showing you a black face after paper isn't helping either... I AM SO SORRY DEARIE!!! Anyone is your shoes would also react how you did react to me dear, i truly agree... I was just wondering if you did thought awhile how i was feeling on that day ma... please dear, please, i am not pin pointing anything, i am trying to say, no matter how much we get mad, we tend to show anger, but after awhile, i will never not think of the situation again... I can never read you mind, telling you or asking you to think on my point of view at that time would not be a good idea either... 

Look dear, i love you, like you said i am not your boyfriend i know, i am still doing things to make you feel how you used to and also hoping that we one day would be together again, i have never been this patient for someone in my life before, neither have i loved someone this much before...  Believe me or not dear! I was hoping we could take things like also as friends. Talk, and joke around... I have envied so many couples the way they talk, the way they communicate with one another, like is as though they are friends and they joke around, but there is love between them... Mithren is a really nice guy, i don't personally know him but i have talked to him few times and all, really a helpful person... Till now, i feel that you are still not comfortable with me whenever Mithren texts you dear, i dunno why i just feel that ma, is like you still don't really trust me... After being such a jerk calling him, i don't wanna say ma, i don't blame you for feeling like that towards me, but i can't get any other chance than this to make sure that i have changed and all, Yes i agree, whenever i am around, obviously I don't you to entertain text messages and all, that'e me dear, don't tell me its wrong for me not spend most of time with the girl i love when i don't really have all the time in the world with her? Is it wrong ma???
On that day, we fought, you texted him saying where you? When ever we fight, i get the feel that you start ignoring me and there you go texting and all, am i wrong to say that honey? Okay if i am wrong, correct me dearie, then you told me you were suppose to meet him and all, i have no idea when you know this or not, but if you happened to know earlier, tell me la darling, Giri/dear, i was suppose to meet Mith, i meet him and come back alright! I would for sure wait what dear, why would i think anything.... Plus, you just went, and then i asked you where you going? You started saying, are you my father all this bla bla... Already i pissed you, i don't blame you for telling me like that ma! 
But dear, You would always tell me before doing anything ma, i was just surprised when you just walk off, plus, saying Psycho all! I AM TERRIBLY SORRY FOR PUTTING YOU IN SUCH A SITUATION, I AM EQUALLY TO BE BLAMED!!!! THERE IS ALSO FAULT ON ME!!! If only i had not shown the black face, things would have been fine, even till now....

I am looking forward for next week, after exams when i can finally see you, you have many activities next week ma, i know... I can simply just come to wherever you go and all, but there is a difference between you calling me come and i volunteer ma, we have talked about this before and yes that also includes on giving you more time to trust me and all, cause right now, i can never get any other better chance than this, and i prolly won't be seeing you  the week after next week as well :( With the time i have right now, i wanna spend time with you, laugh with you, have fun with you, talk to you, spend each minute with you by my side, right now, i am saying about me? I wonder if you wanna do the same thing as well dear? I really miss you, Hope you are doing fine dear.... 

Once again, please forgive me if i have said anything wrong or if i have hurt you or misinterpreted things, if i am wrong, please correct me and don't be mad at me BO!!!

XOXOXO <3 I love you so much Pumpkin!!! Bo, feel so much better now, never wanted make you feel bad or anything dear, i didn't wanna hide my thoughts from you, i had my say sweetheart!